I'm often asked, How do you manage it?

Of late, I've been asked, “How do you do it? How are you able to manage?” Manage what…do what...you may ask? How does one go on, daily, doing anything else other than thinking about losing the person you love most in the world. How do I do it? How does anyone do it? You just do! I’ve in turn asked others going through similar situations how they feel able to cope. Basically you put one foot in front of the other and eventually you walk. Everything is broken down to the small things. You go to work, and then you come home. You go to the hospital, and then you come home. In between you just do it. Not that you are feeling like a robot. I feel and I sure cry a lot lately…but I’m told by a reliable source (actually a few professionals and nonprofessionals that I’m actually normal)…go figure. So when my mother asks me to take her to the bathroom, I just do it. She needs me (or my sister or one of our aunts, or the nurse) to help her with a basic need, something she was able to do for herself only three weeks ago. She needs us to help her life the spoon to her mouth and sometimes to encourage her to swallow… There was a time when she took me to the bathroom, fed me, cuddled me, and loved me. Now it’s my turn. I wish I could be unselfish and say that I would gladly trade places with her, so that she could live, but frankly I’m not that brave. I just hope I’m brave enough to be there right to the end for her. To cuddle her and to love her as long as she needs me.