Decluttering - Part 2

Well the decluttering project is coming along very well. Last night I purchased those plastic drawers from Walmart...reasonably priced I may say and have put it in my bathroom. Looks very nice and everything is handy. Moved a few other things around and as I left for work this morning, looked at my apartment and smiled. It looked very nice if I do say so myself. I like when it's neat and clean...(now if I can only get the dumb cat to put ALL of her bum in the cat litter and to stop peeing on the bathroom floor. My tiles are going to start disintegrating from all the bleach I've put on the floor and litter box...trying to clean it up. Granted she is 18 years old and obviously getting demented but I'm getting tired of this!)

Anyways, back to the decluttering...it's a nice feeling to get organized...I still have a lot more to do..my storage room and the kitchen...but it will definitely get done.

:-))))

CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!

CONGRATULATIONS DRINA...

DRINA FINALLY (IT MUST NOW BE A COLD DAY IN HELL) HAS PASSED HER TEST AND NOW HAS A DRIVER'S LICENSE AT THE RIPE OLD AGE OF 45 (OOPS...THAT'S 28 AND HOLDING FOR ALL OF YOU).

CONGRATS!!! KNEW YOU COULD DO IT.

JUST GIVE ME A SECOND TO MOVE MY CAR OFF THE ROAD....LOL

Jakub's withdrawal

For Jakub who was going through my blog withdrawal...this blog entry is for you!!

Bernadette

Katrina's other victims

Sunday I picked up the phone to call my bestfriend...who ironically was calling me at the same time. She lives in London, Ontario. We were both watching the same program it seems....the found but unreunited pets...victims of the Katrina disaster. I watched as a man who had lost everything drove 10 hours to pick up his cat and cried as he cried while holding this beautiful cat who was not too impressed with all the attention. Felines.... These were true victims (other than the children and elderly and infirmed) who COULD NOT get out of the Katrina's way. (Granted there were those not in these already mentioned categories who for economical reasons...ie no money for transportation, who also were not able to get out of the area before Katrina hit). But I want to talk about these pets...who did not understand why they were left behind...much less the name of the hurricane that turned their world (some literally) upside down. Unable to forage for food and clean water...alone...afraid. My heart just breaks.

Hopefully most of these lost ones will be reunited with their loving owners/caregivers. Those who are unable to, hopefully will go to loving homes.

The last film - Mom

These pictures were taken in June 2005.
They were the last roll of film I took of mom before using my new digital camera. I love these pictures because despite her frailness, she was happy being with the family. She was wearing a comfortable blue dress...one that I will hold onto I suspect for a very long time. She was an amazing woman...I hope to write about that some day...it's difficult just to write about this. Mom fought hard and peacefully slipped into a restful but temporary (Revelation 21:3&4) sleep Thursday, August 4th, 2005 at approximately 3:50 pm. We miss her so very much!!!

Decluttering

I am a fan of Clean Sweep and all those other shows that try to teach us that 'more is NOT better'...well I guess it depends on what we are talking about...but when talking about stuff....I'm inclined to agree.

I've begun spending a few hours here and there trying to declutter my place. 2 1/2 years ago I moved from a 2 bedroom huge basement apartment to a small one bedroom (monette=no dining room=very small) apartment. While I packed for my move, I got rid of things...or so I thought, having underestimated the size of my new apartment. After the move (which took one HUGE truck load) and several car loads after (how can one person accumulate so much stuff???)...I threw out and gave away a lot of stuff.

Now it's time to get even more ruthless and organize my apartment. I've wanted to do this for 2 1/2 years....but always felt overwhelmed. I was finally motivated by a coworker who was having to cope without her housecleaner for a 1 1/2 months (vacation) (my friend did not want her housecleaning lady to come back to a messy condo (go figure)...and so began to slowly declutter her condo so that it would be easier to clean.

So, if you don't need...get rid of it. Goodwill and shelters are happy to take things that are still useful to others. If it takes up too much room (my computer desk which worked great in a huge basement apartment)...then see if someone wants it.

You may wonder, why don't I just do a yard sale?? Well I live in an apartment for one thing...and having done yard sales before...it's frankly more work than its worth!

Little by little...you can declutter your living space too!!

Whatever!

Katrina's aftermath

I recently wrote in comment to another's blog that I had little understanding for what these people were going through. How true. I admit that I am disgusted with the looting for nonnecessities.

Yes it's true I have never gone through anything like this in my life. I do understand that these people feel so desparate that they feel they need to seek food and water.

However, like many, I am disgusted that others within these hard hit and desparate areas show their inhumanity by using guns to intimidate and slow down any help that is forthcoming.

I watched via tv how many are pleading for help and feeling abandoned.

I forgot that they did not have access to radio, tv or internet and did not know that people were desparately trying to help.

I actually regret my previous comments...that these people should get off their butts and help themselves...what do I know. I haven't just lost my home and everything I know.

May God give them strength to endure.

Karla Holmolka (Teale)

I keep reading of various opionions of whether Karla has a right to her privacy or not...I admit that I almost agreed the other day, but then stopped myself. Karla has served 12 years for the murders of two young girls. She did not serve anything for her sister's death, nor for the rape of Jane Doe. However she was sentenced to 12 years and served that time...oh yes...only before it came to light that she had much more to do with the above crimes. Otherwise, she would have gotten a longer sentence, perhaps even a life sentence with no chance of parole...so when I thought of it this way, bottom line is...I hope she is hounded for the rest of her life. I hope each time she finds a little peace in her life, I hope it is torn away from her as she tore away the lives of those innocent girls. I hope she finds it harder and harder to trust...I hope she looks over her shoulder for the rest of her life...I hope it's NOT a long life!

Update on Sarah-BC girl and blood transfusion

This is to further update everyone on the story Dill wrote about awhile ago...the young 14 year old BC girl (now 15) who has successfully undergone treatment in New York. It was in today's National Post, but unfortunately you must pay to subscribe online. The article is excellent and if you are interested, I would be happy to make a copy (Nadia is that legal???). If not, I can paraphrase from the article (is that legal?)...(so much for studying law...I think paraphrasing is legal...but not 100% sure). Anyways, the whole point of the article is that she is doing well, should be home now and going back to school, Grade 10 in September. She mentioned in the article that the whole case was not about 'religious freedom' but rather personal freedom. The Charter of Rights of Canada gives us freedom to choose...and she was relieved that the NY doctors looked her in the eye, asked her what she wanted and listened to what SHE had to say and did not call her 'the child' as she had been called by the courts in Canada. Out of the mouth of babes!!!

Excellent article for freedom..on so many levels!

Ben

Devoted Sisters

I wanted to write today about the devotion that three amazing women who just happen to be my mother's sisters showed. Isabel, Gabriella (Gaby) and Conceicao (Connie). These were three of my mother's sisters. These women showed loved, strength, consideration, compassion and so many other amazing qualities in the past month. It isn't easy arriving early morning at a hospital to toilet, bath and feed your sister. It isn't exactly the most exciting place to be. It isn't easy to watch someone you love so much losing their life and still smile and make her laugh. That's what they did. They all did what they could and so much more.

Mom lost her battle with cancer Thursday, August 4th, 2005. She said she would fight until the end. She did, but she could never have done this without her sisters.

Thank you so much.

Ben

My list of what I like...

A really good book
Music
Freshly fallen snow on the trees
The smell of a fireplace
Sitting in front of the fireplace, feeling the warmth, surrounded by my loved ones
Being held in someone's arms
Being told that I'm loved
Telling my loved ones that they are loved
Holding my Taby in my arms even when it was the last time
Sunsets
Dill's cedar planked BBQed salmon and dill (actually basically anything she cooks...)
Mom's soups and millo
Getting on a plane to go somewhere else in this world to see something new
The feel of the ocean (saltwater)
Swaying palm trees
Pretending I'm an alligator in a swimming pool in Cuba
Sending Uncle Manny Franca for some more drinks in Cuba
Kissing my nieces faces
Laughter
A clean apartment, when everything is in it's place and the dust and furballs have been banished...albeit temporarily
Pictures taken of good times
Memories of good times
Making new memories of good times

I'm often asked, How do you manage it?

Of late, I've been asked, “How do you do it? How are you able to manage?” Manage what…do what...you may ask? How does one go on, daily, doing anything else other than thinking about losing the person you love most in the world. How do I do it? How does anyone do it? You just do! I’ve in turn asked others going through similar situations how they feel able to cope. Basically you put one foot in front of the other and eventually you walk. Everything is broken down to the small things. You go to work, and then you come home. You go to the hospital, and then you come home. In between you just do it. Not that you are feeling like a robot. I feel and I sure cry a lot lately…but I’m told by a reliable source (actually a few professionals and nonprofessionals that I’m actually normal)…go figure. So when my mother asks me to take her to the bathroom, I just do it. She needs me (or my sister or one of our aunts, or the nurse) to help her with a basic need, something she was able to do for herself only three weeks ago. She needs us to help her life the spoon to her mouth and sometimes to encourage her to swallow… There was a time when she took me to the bathroom, fed me, cuddled me, and loved me. Now it’s my turn. I wish I could be unselfish and say that I would gladly trade places with her, so that she could live, but frankly I’m not that brave. I just hope I’m brave enough to be there right to the end for her. To cuddle her and to love her as long as she needs me.

Is it hot enough for you?? Part II

This morning I arrived at work feeling sick to my stomach. Why you ask? The heat, the humidity and the air that I had to breathe to get to work. My car AC is still not working (a work in progress) and coupled with being stuck occasionally by foul smelling and badly maintained vehicles (mostly vans...why is that??) I wanted to throw up when I arrived in the office. My head was pounding despite having swallowed several extra strenth tylenols and my stomach churned...it took a couple of hours of AC and cleaner smelling air to finally feel better.

So we are asked to conserve energy and spare the air. So don't turn on your AC, because offices need to leave numerous unused office lights on. Yesterday as I walked one corridor of the hospital where my mother is now a patient, I couldn't help but notice the misuse of energy. Doors left wide open to the outside air (air conditioning blowing out or hot air blowing in), lights in meeting rooms that were not being used, lights on in the 'bowling alley"..yes they have an old bowling alley in this hospital (nursing home...for the residents...although I don't think its used that often..obviously)...tvs and lights in patients rooms (I turned mom's off when she fell asleep). They (who are they...they are the politicians that ride around in their airconditioned limos and work in air conditioning and sleep in airconditioning....) want us..me and you to take the TTC. Spare the air people. Ride an unairconditioned bus/streetcar with people who are antipersperantly challenged...yes it's better for them that I breathe in someone's BO than contribute to the smog by driving my car. Well you know what I say to that????

WHATEVER!!!

To adopt or to not adopt...too many questions for me...

Wednesday evening I went to the Toronto Humane Society to see a cat that had been advertised as needing a home. Since Taby's death, Shamu has become, I believe, somewhat lonely and depressed. She just mopes about the apartment. Well she moped before too, but it seems she is moping more. Of course she is 18 years old...18 year old cats mope, sleep, poop, etc...and meow constantly (and extremely irritatingly) for food. So I went to meet Tinker, a 18 year old male cat that had been taken to the THS when his owner had to move into a senior's home. I thought, 18 year old cat with another 18 year old cat might work. Tinker is a strawberry blonde (orange) tabby and in the picture he looked cute. So I thought, I'll go check him out.

Well Tinker turned out to be an 18 year old orange tabby with a very infected eye and arthritic legs. He barely acknowledged me (except to give me a glare out of his good eye effectively telling me to take a hike!). He did not seem to be affectionate or friendly...however he did not growl or hiss at me either...he just ignored me. I felt no chemistry. I was disappointed. On top of that, I was informed by a staff member that I needed to be able to quarantine him from Shamu for at least 14 days. Where? I have a small monette apartment (that means I don't have a 'dining room'). Where the heck do I quarantine a cat with a leaking eye and arthritic legs? My bedroom? I think not!!!

So I've decided to let Shamu live out her remaining years and after that I will reexamine the situation (unless I see a cute kitten and bring it home anyways)...there was this adorable young cat (not kitten) who looked soooooooo much like Taby, but was very friendly and affectionate....

Whatever!

Is it hot enough for you?

Is it hot enought for you? When did we go from winter to summer? I have to admit I was looking forward to spring. It's my favorite season, but summer...heat and humidity? Not my favorite unless I'm lying in a swimming pool with a pina colada in my hand (the Bicardi cooler variety is fine with me too).

My AC works at least 16 hours (it's a window unit with a 'energy saver' feature to conserve energy and maintain a certain temperature). My poor Shamu lies on the floor (and that's WITH AC...). I'm surprised I haven't found her taking a shower yet to keep cool.

My neighbours who do not have AC...well they spend their evenings outside in the courtyard between the two buildings. Thankfully the AC drowns out the noise otherwise I wouldn't be able to sleep and would be extremely grouchy come the morning.

My car...my poor 15 year old car's AC is NOT working. Needless to say that I'm extremely uncomfortable by the time I reach my destination especially in the evening. I have relearned the trick of putting my hand out and directing the airflow towards me while driving (not an easy thing to do with a standard car and traffic coming against me...), but it works occasionally.

Oh well I'm sure to remember this next January and February when I'm wishing it was a little warmer....

Whatever!

Parking Lot Rage

Okay...so it's happened to me....parking lot rage. No I wasn't on the receiving end...I dished it out.

This morning, after a frustrating 45 minute drive to work, I get to the parking lot near where I work. Blocking the entrance is this van, with the door ajar (that means open okay!!).

Anyhow, this woman comes back to her van and starts pressing all around the box looking for the button that will give her ticket and let her into the parking lot. She even presses the sides of the box until she finally presses the right button (THE FLASHING BUTTON) and goes in. My eyes roll and I'm thinking "what a twit!!!". As I drive up the ramp, low and behold the twit is backing up the van. "Now what??? She can't find the parking spot too????"...

So I decided to go around the twit...then she turns to her left (without signaling) and of course I beep and yell "Make up your mind where you're going!!" She yells back, "That's my spot!" (thinking I was trying to take her spot, which I wasn't). So I yell back, "I don't want the spot...I just want you to make up your mind!" She says, "Calm down... It's my first time in the city". At this point I'm ready to ram her van...so I yell at her, "You're stupid!!!! Stay out of the city!!!"

Yes I did say that and then I drove quickly around her.

So for all of you who think that I'm such a nice calm person...YOU ARE SOOOOOOOO WRONG!!!!

Have a nice day!

Whatever!!

What do you do for a living?

It's interesting to me when people ask personal questions such as "What do you do for a living?"

I realize that it is a way of 'getting to know' someone...but does the fact that what a person does for a living really say much about them? Hmmm...I'm a medical secretary in a psychiatry clinic...what does that say about me, I wonder? I have relatives who are employed as a nurse, publicist, legal secretary, mechanic, homemaker, accountant, trucker, landscaper, ttc conductor, teacher, etc. etc. etc....

It is human nature to want to know about others, especially those closest to us. I stop and think about the job descriptions...some sound very glamourous and exciting...some sound boring...and yet they are all wonderful and necessary in their own way.

Regardless of the employment titles attached to us, there are so many other titles that are attached...mother, sister, father, brother, cousin, aunt, uncle, etc. Sometimes the titles are not so flattering...but we won't go there. Whatever/whoever we are...isn't it wonderful to see the variety of people in our family. Can't call us boring!!!

Whatever!

Friday the 13th...bad luck? I think not!!!

Today is Friday, May 13th.

As I drove in this morning to work, I couldn't help but notice that there were considerably less traffic. I wondered...could people actually be taking the day off because they are afraid it is "Friday the 13th"??

So I did a bit of research...Okay I didn't have to look to far. An article in the Yahoo News quoted in part here: "Fears about Friday the 13th stem from early Christianity...Friday was the day on which Christ was crucified. ... Judas was considered the 13th person at the table (of the Last Supper) and he of course, is the betrayer. Taylor said 13 was linked with evil by Christians in the Middle Ages in the belief that witches met in covens of 13, and the 13th member was the devil. She adds the superstition is only a western phenomenon. "Within western culture Friday the 13th is perceived as being unlucky .... (In other cultures) it's meaningless."

So it seems that only the Western world (and we think that we are SOOOO much more advanced that every other part of this earth...yeah right) is afraid when the 13th day of any month falls on a Friday.

I admit I do not understand this particular fear. I parked in the number 13 spot when I went for my driver's test. I passed. I have never had anything bad happen to me on the 13th of any day...it happens on any other day. Most of all, today is my mother's 66th (real) birthday. (Her father only registered her as having been born on the 18th of May...due to the fact he waited too long to register her and would have had to pay a fine..it's a long story...back in Madeira...give the guy a break..his wife had 14 kids...never mind give my poor grandmother the break!!)

So you see, today, Friday, May 13th, 2005 is the day that my beautiful and loving mother has been on this earth for 66 years. Bad luck? Oh no. I'm the fortunate one. I could not have asked for someone who has been (next to God) my best friend. Someone who has loved me, understood me (including giving me a kick in the butt when I needed it) and showed tremendous patience with me all my life. Someone who rubbed my tummy when I had stomach pains (okay she doesn't do that any more...it's a big tummy now). She used to tickle my forehead and I would fall asleep knowing that I was loved and so safe in her arms. I watch her do that with my nieces now....and know that they are so very fortunate too.

So Friday the 13th....what a wonderful day this is. Enjoy it. I know I will!

Ben

Radio Station Politics

I'm feeling a bit discombobulated today. I am a radio station channel surfer. (I also surf t.v., and internet...Basically because I'm an inpatient person). One of my favorite radio stations used to be CHFI FM. I loved to listen to Erin Davis and Bob Magee (I even have a CHFI mug, in addition to my EZ Rock mug and a 92.5 country channel mug that no longer exists).

I would occasionally also listen to CHUM FM and Marilyn, Roger and Rick (They always put Marilyn's name last...silly people!). A few years ago, I discovered EZ Rock. Oh finally, I have found what I loved, the music and the morning people, Christine Cardosa (Portuguese) and Mike Cooper. They were a match made in heaven...or so I thought. It became a competition between CHFI and EZ Rock. I flipped more times than a fish caught in the net. The music was similar and they were both good. In the end, nationality won and I stuck with EZ Rock because Christine was Portuguese and I could relate to her comments.

Then the first wave of the radio war began: unexpectedly after many many years at CHFI, Erin Davis was fired. I was livid. I even wrote to the owners, Rogers, telling them that I would no longer listen to CHFI...and I've mostly kept my word. Wrote to Erin and told her how disgusted I was with what happened. (I was one of many many people). Last fall, Erin was invited to join Mike Cooper at EZ Rock while Christine went on maternity leave. I was in heaven. What would have made it the best would have been Mike, Christine and Erin in the morning...(hey it's working for Chum fm) but it was not to be. It seems CHFI finally snagged a brain and wooed Erin back. They also, how I do not know, managed to woo Mike over too. In the meantime, after giving his radio station his required notice, they discovered that Mike and Erin would be at CHFI. So Erin was 'let go' prior to her contract ending. The radio ratings came out yesterday. Apparently, and no surprise to me, Mike and Erin had a huge impact and have managed to raise the ratings considerably for EZ Rock. I have no doubt they will do the same when they are reunited again in the fall at CHFI. What was sad to read was that Mike was shunned at a celebratory event last night. I have never met this man, and I can't say I 'know' him, but he sounds like a decent guy. He has been with his wife, who he apparently adores for many many years, has raised children and certainly did not deserve to be treated this way.

I'm still not sure who I will listen to when the radio war is over...but people should not be treated like lepers (lepers shouldn't be treated badly either) just because they make a career move.

Whatever!

I've met Joe Pesci

Okay it's NOT the REAL Joe Pesci but I swear he looks and talks like him.

I started my next course last night. This short, dark haired, Italian looking, a lawyer is our new instructor (professor). I was mesmirized by the fluff on his hair...you know the kind that blows in the air and lands on someone's head. I had to keep telling myself to let the fluff go and concentrate on what was being taught...but something kept nagging me...he looks familiar...the guy from Welcome Back Carter...no not quite....who the heck does this guy remind me off...short legs...yak yak yak...and then BAM...just before break it hits me in the head...OH MY GOODNESS...It's cousin Vinny...no I mean Joe Pesci...he even sounds like him. This is going to be a very very difficult course...concentrate on the material Ben...and stop laughing!!!